NES The Vault


Dr. Chaos

Votes: 10
Reviews: 2

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Reviewer: Smurfette Date: Jul 8, 2005
Just to be fair, I'm basing this review on my experience with the game when I first played it way-back-when. I have yet to will myself to play the thing again. In any case, I hated this game.

Graphics: 3
How can I put this into words? The graphics creeped me out, and I really don't know why. There's something fundamentally wrong with the way this game looks, and it goes beyond the fact that everything looks like it was rendered in a bootleg copy of MS Paint. By a three-year-old. With a learning disability.

Sound: 2
The music in the game made me want to shoot myself. It sounded like the aforementioned three-year-old trying to play the accordian.

Gameplay: 4
The play control was all right, I guess, but I kept getting stuck while I was looking for Warp Zones. And unlike, say, The Legend of Zelda or Ninja Gaiden, this game isn't fun or rewarding enough to justify the frustration.

Overall: 3
Did I mention that I hated this game? Even talking about it right now is bringing up a nasty bile taste in my throat.

You can check this out for yourself and draw your own conclusions, but for me, this was one of the worst games I ever played on any gaming system. And not in an Ed Wood "So bad it's funny" kind of way. It's more like smashing your thumb with a hammer or squirting lemon juice in your eye.


Reviewer: MatthiasBOB Date: May 18, 2002
Yup... yup. Ok then, this game is a classic that I grew up with. I never beat it until recently when I downloaded it onto my computer and me and my friend stayed up and played ROMs all nite. I must warn you, if you are looking for a game with depth and a plot, do NOT download this. If you want just pure solid action and confusion, here ya go. Basically you're some guy looking for your father in a house full of monsters, hidden caves and demons.

Graphics: 5
It looks like all the pixels are an inch long. Not too convincing realism, but this is the NES, so give it a break. I gotta give it more than a 3 cuz there is one particular monster who is like a little deformed lawn gnome/frog and he jumps around like a madman. It's vewy scawy to me.

Sound: 3
Bwahahaha. Sound is not the NES's strong point, expecially in this game. Since when does a knife squeek when you stab?

Gameplay: 8
Yeah, this is a little better. There are weak and strong points. Controls are easy and relatively responsive in the side-scrolling action levels. One part in this game that is much harder to figure out is when you go inside the rooms. You are in a Rescue: Embassy Mission type situation where you have the cardinal directions. You point and click stuff w/ your hand and move it to the extreme left or right to switch directions. To selet a different mode like GO or HIT, hold B and move up or down. Monsters sometimes pop out of open windows, doors, or closets and automatically chase you outside. The only one to really worry about is the Yeti's and Frankenstein's love child. But, he only takes three bullets to take out.

Overall: 8
I give it an 8, because it's a pretty old game and though maybe not well thought out plotwise, it's just fun to see if you can beat it. Very challenging.

I will give you a tip too - HIT EVERYTHING. If there is a big blank wall, hit all over it. If there is a wall with crap on it, hit it too. Hit any part of the wall that isn't a door, a closet, a credenza, a table, or a window. Hit everything else. There are holes everywhere, and you need to find them to beat the game.