Re: grand salad
Posted by Syntax on .
GOD DAMNIT! What the hell's wrong with you man. Johnross makes this hilarious post, so funny that my neighbour heard me laughing on his way to the bus stop down the street, so funny and clever. he obviously put a lot of thought into how to make the lines flow to keep the humor level high without overdoing it or destroying the fine balance. After all that, you reply with "You are correct." How fucking stupid. Not funny at all, not clever, no "haha, after a big long post, someone posted a couple words only. that's funny!", nothing like that. Just fucking dumb.
That's like being invited to this huge enormous national symposium of science, every major scientist and intellectual in the whole world is there, one guy is barely alive he has open heart surgery that afternoon but he still flew in to see the event, huge spectacle. Top-rated highly respected world renowned scientist goes up and gives a 5 hour long speech describing that God exists and lives on a dinosaur island and we can get to him just by saying the right words, the exact combination of words which the scientist worked out on a supercomputer which calculated through a gigantic formula over the span of 48 years. how the human race actually evolved directly from seagulls and we have the ability to fly, giving complete non-negotiable proof of these facts, every person in the 100,000 seat arena is wide-eyed barely taking a breath, every household that has a TV is crowded around not moving a fucking millimetre in case they miss something, one guy in New Zealand misses one word of the whole lecture and shoots himself in the head, even the wind stops blowing because it's too noisy. biggest fucking event of this millenium, biggest scientific breakthrough in recorded history, trumps anything before it. The man finishes his speech and the crowd bursts into a deafening clap, lasts for over an hour, some people's hands are raw and bloody but they dont care.
Then you walk up to the stage to give the follow-up speech to the greatest most phenomenal speech in history, crowd is almost pissing themselves, everyone at home is anxious they can't wait, you walk up to the podium and the microphone makes that screeching noise when someone gets too close, everyone is so silent a pin drops in Arabia and they all hear it, you clear your throat and approach the microphone ever-so-assuredly and say to the whole world with your best preschool inside voice: "Okay." Then you smile like a dumbass and clap yourself off the stage, your stupid wife in the front row also claps cuz she's stupid. everyone sits there for 800 years not moving, long after their bodies rot and their limbs fall off cuz they can't believe what the fuck you just said. That's how fucking stupid that was.
That's like being invited to this huge enormous national symposium of science, every major scientist and intellectual in the whole world is there, one guy is barely alive he has open heart surgery that afternoon but he still flew in to see the event, huge spectacle. Top-rated highly respected world renowned scientist goes up and gives a 5 hour long speech describing that God exists and lives on a dinosaur island and we can get to him just by saying the right words, the exact combination of words which the scientist worked out on a supercomputer which calculated through a gigantic formula over the span of 48 years. how the human race actually evolved directly from seagulls and we have the ability to fly, giving complete non-negotiable proof of these facts, every person in the 100,000 seat arena is wide-eyed barely taking a breath, every household that has a TV is crowded around not moving a fucking millimetre in case they miss something, one guy in New Zealand misses one word of the whole lecture and shoots himself in the head, even the wind stops blowing because it's too noisy. biggest fucking event of this millenium, biggest scientific breakthrough in recorded history, trumps anything before it. The man finishes his speech and the crowd bursts into a deafening clap, lasts for over an hour, some people's hands are raw and bloody but they dont care.
Then you walk up to the stage to give the follow-up speech to the greatest most phenomenal speech in history, crowd is almost pissing themselves, everyone at home is anxious they can't wait, you walk up to the podium and the microphone makes that screeching noise when someone gets too close, everyone is so silent a pin drops in Arabia and they all hear it, you clear your throat and approach the microphone ever-so-assuredly and say to the whole world with your best preschool inside voice: "Okay." Then you smile like a dumbass and clap yourself off the stage, your stupid wife in the front row also claps cuz she's stupid. everyone sits there for 800 years not moving, long after their bodies rot and their limbs fall off cuz they can't believe what the fuck you just said. That's how fucking stupid that was.
You are correct.
Replies:
| Re: grand salad | solis -- 7/20/2006 7:00 am UTC |
| Re: grand salad | johnross -- 9/4/2006 8:59 am UTC |