| Now, Mike Meyers is a good actor, I admit. I liked his work in Austin Powers and I enjoyed his skits on Saturday Night Live. But this... I can't even begin to explain what an embarassment this game must be to Mike. I bet if anyone asked him about it today, he would go into some sort of Vietnam War-style flashback and get shellshock all over again. Graphics: 2
This entire game looks like it was done on microsoft paint. Well, the levels do, at least. In between stages (if you can call them that,) are grainy green pictures of Wayne and Garth, along with text and jokes so hokey you'll vomit if you read them more than once. The NES just was not ready for actual real-life images of people. These pictures look like...I can't describe it. I'd need a visual aid. Let's move on. Sound: 1
In a game that ties in with a movie that was mostly about music, you would think that the music IN said game would at least be good. If there were a word that meant the EXACT opposite of every positive adjective put together, that word would describe this music. The first stage's music is on a THREE SECOND LOOP. I am not kidding. And since the rest of the music is so unintelligable, it all sounds like the same crap. There is also a soundbite of Wayne saying ""No Way!"", which was probably taken from the exact moment that Mike saw this game. Gameplay: 1
Here's the creamy crap center of this crap candy: The gameplay is so uninspired and monotonous that I would rather use a cactus to remove my earwax than play another minute of it. The game offers two characters: 1.) Badly animated blonde sprite (Garth), and 2.) badly animated sprite with black cap on (Wayne). Of course, you have absolutely no control over which character to use, and it doesn't really matter because the game already has you in its clutches. Here's an interesting little bit -- As Garth, you are armed with a laser gun, which you shoot at drums with legs and cymbals with eyes, while the same three second loop tripe plays in the background. Not only is it not fun, it's not even related to the movie in any way, shape or form! As Wayne, you have no laser gun, but instead, are armed with a weak, flail of your leg that sort of resembles a kick. Each stage has a time limit, and if you are in any one stage past said time limit, you will die. Literally. YOU will die. Of boredom and despair. Overall: 1
A good alternative to crucifixion or 'the rack,' but not good for entertainment purposes. ""Denied!!""
TonberryKing.
If there's any game you'd like to see reviewed, or even if you want to just drop me a line, email to living_whisper@hotmail.com |
